DV memories seem to live forever,
Mood:  blue
Over two years ago my husband attacked me. The man actually tried to kill me. Wow. That sort of stuff isn't supposed to happen to real people. It's supposed to be limited to Lifetime Movie Network movies, right? But it did happen. To me. And to a lot of other people out there. It makes me so sad and angry because I am not over it yet. I am not better. I am not healed. I am not who I once was before I let that wretched man into my life. I don't think I'll ever be that person again. And you know what? I don't want to be. Because now I know how to watch out for myself and my kids. Yes, I actually had two kids with that man. Both were forced upon me, because he raped me. Which of course he says wasn't rape because we were married. But anyway...I digress. I may not be "cured", but I know that I will be alright. And one day I may be better than alright. Every day for more than two years, I have woken up stronger and more sure of myself and my place in the world that I was the day before. Which is kind of sad and gives you an idea of how bad off I was before, since I'm still not all that great more than two years later. But every day I wake up stronger, I have won. I have won that day.